Seeing old friends

For most, there’s a terrible, anxiety inducing moment when seeing someone you used to know walking down the street towards you. Bumping into an old friend or acquaintance can often be awkward and strange encounters. Difficult conversations with abrupt endings. Some people would rather cross the street and pretend the ground is the most interesting thing they’ve ever seen. But not being able to navigate these encounters successfully means you are leaving a large gap in your social-tools repertoire. These encounters don’t have to be nightmare fuel.

Is a flooded bridge worse than a burnt bridge?

Please drop the incredibly awkward "So sorry, I’ve forgotten your name". You both know you know each other, and that’s enough. Don’t allow them to know you don’t have the decency of remembering their name. If you know it, great, you can use it. But if you don’t, you’re better off saying nothing at all. 

Don’t make future plans. There is nothing worse than saying you should catch up again when neither of you have any intentions of doing so. If you really do want to catch up, make plans immediately that day, or on the following day at worst. If you leave it any longer than that, it’s definitely too late. 

Avoid any bad history, and focus on positives. If you can remember anything about them, be sure to drop it in a line. It makes you seem thoughtful. But please don’t remember that awkward or embarrassing time, and instead focus on something that they succeeded in. Or at worst, focus on something they are succeeding in now. 

Be the first to leave. Make up any excuse you like. Excusing yourself means your acquaintance doesn't have to make up their own excuse to leave. You can pretend like you have to be somewhere or meet somewhere, anything will do. And when you do excuse yourself, make them feel special. Make them feel like you’ve used up their time. A simple, "I’m really sorry, I have to let you go now, it was really nice to see you.” will suffice. 

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Remember, everyone defines success in their very own unique and special way. Avoid the mistake of comparing your position to theirs. It’s simply not comparable. And if you did bump into someone right now, what would you want to share with them? Who would you want to bump into? And if there is someone on your mind, don’t wait for chance. Pick up the phone and give them a call.