Social cues

Conversations flow with friends like wine at a dinner party. We know from experience when our friends are happy and when they are not. We know when they are really upset at something or just blowing off steam with colourful language. We understand the thousands of subconscious social cues they advertise to us like an illuminated billboard on a night-time drive. But when we talk to new people, it can be difficult to understand where we sit with them. 

Why did this guy park so far away from the motel?

Who do you think you could have an easier conversation with? A poker player who’s job it is to conceal their subconscious body language from view, or an actor, whose job it is to overemphasize emotion to appeal to the masses. Even if the actor is angry with us, at least we know they are angry. There is no wasted energy on interpretation or misreading the room. It puts us at ease, and we can break bread accordingly.

This was not what his mum meant by break-fast

So when you’re with strangers, laugh a little bit louder. Smile harder or make your excuse to leave quicker. Make it obvious. Make them understand how they make you feel with your body language and subconsciously they will respond. We will always have the tightest bonds with our inner circle, but it doesn’t hurt to make others feel a little more at ease by acting in an obvious way.